Some people think that being in recovery, whether firsthand or secondhand from addiction, so either you have it or your loved one has it, being in recovery for trauma, being in recovery for grief and loss, for mental illness first hand or secondhand, they think it’s a sign of weakness. They think something went wrong. They think that there’s a problem with it. That’s a philosophy they have because the same people that say “oh my life is doomed, now I have a problem with addiction, my loved one has a problem with addiction, my life is messed up now, because I just experienced this catastrophic loss, my life is is over now because of the traumas I had, I can never be able to form relationships and trust.” That is all a philosophy.
My Personal Philosophy on Recovery Process
You want to know what my philosophy is on the recovery process? It’s the greatest gift a human being can ever experience and you might be saying how is drugs and alcohol ruining someone’s life a gift? Because of what’s available and accessible on the other side in the path of recovery. How can going through trauma as a child be a gift? You don’t know what it was like, you don’t know what it felt like, but what it creates is the psychological and emotional muscles to be resilient in life to overcome the next obstacle and the next obstacle and the next obstacle. Being in recovery is a superpower. Being in recovery says I’m courageous enough to look at myself, to look at my life and say I want more, I want to do better, I want to be better. Being in recovery is like a superhero cape but that’s a philosophy that I have and I hope you start to embrace that same philosophy. I believe all human beings have to be in recovery. We’re all recovering from something but some people say they’re gonna go do it and some people say they’re not and sometimes those big glaring situations like addiction or mental illness or trauma forces us into it a little bit and if you haven’t experienced some of those you’re kind of like a little bit more cautious, but it’s all a philosophy.
Control Your Sails, Not The Wind
And the one way I like to look at philosophy in a more metaphoric simple way. Let’s use sailing for example – if you get on a sailboat and you get in the ocean I’m going to give you a news flash – you have no control or power of the direction of the wind, the strength of the wind, the type of the wind, but what you can set your sails based on the win to get to the destination you are trying to get to. We don’t have control over external stimuli sometimes but we have sails in our own life that allows us, despite the conditions, to get to the destination we want to get to. And please remember this, that direction is more important than speed. We are caught up in this world thinking that we have to get there quick we have to get there now. We have to get there yesterday. No you don’t. You just have to be headed towards that direction. Direction is more important than speed.
So I like to define at this point what is failure and what is success. I know those are very subjective definitions and I know my definition is different than your definition. And your definition is different than the next person’s definition but overall this is what I kind of believe and this is again gathered from Jim Rohn applied to the recovery process.
Failure is a few errors in judgment repeated every day. Success is a few positive disciplines, simple disciplines applied every day. -Jim Rohn
So when you wake up in the morning if you have a few failed errors in judgment “I should have, I shouldn’t have done that, I should have gone there, oh man I knew better…” if you do that every day you’re headed to destination Failure and if you wake up and say “I’m gonna do something positive for my mind, something positive for my body, something positive for my spirit,” simple disciplines, you’re headed towards success. I don’t care what my definition is but you’re headed there.
You can’t control the wind but you can set your sails.
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