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Pillars of Success


What is up, everyone? Welcome back to another family education and support group that’s rooted in the fundamental belief of the possibility of human transformation. I am your host Parham. I’m here each and every single Saturday for the most part and with the opportunity to hopefully add a little value to your day, your week, your month, your year, ultimately your life. So let’s see what we got here. Marilyn already jumping on, proactively saying “Good Morning Parham. Thank you in advance for sharing all your wisdom with us. You are a breath of fresh air.” Oh I like that, thank you. Miss Danielle, good morning, you’re welcome to the show. Happy to have you here as always! What is up, Katalin, how are you doing today? Happy to have you guys here again for another one. And whoever comes on… oh, we got to say Hi to the the crew over there at Pacific Sands. And Happy Holidays to you guys and girls and thanks for all you guys doing in that neck of the woods, and the possibility of human transformation. Mina’s coming in, everyone’s popping in, I appreciate the love and the support. Let me just do a little introduction so I won’t say Hi to people for a little bit. 


This is a weekly live stream for the most part, I would say probably 46 out of the 52 weeks of the year we do have this. If you go to our YouTube page and look at our past live videos you’ll be able to see almost four years worth of videos. You’ll see me in various forms of shape, you’ll see me with long hair, you’ll see me with short hair, you’ll see me with shaved head, you’ll see different versions of me, you’ll see me with a clean shave, you’ll see me with a long beard, but the constant is the message of the possibility of transformation. So a little bit about myself – I got a master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy with an emphasis in Child Development. I am in recovery myself, so June 13th of 2008 is the day that I kind of decided to navigate and change my life around and some of the decisions were because of just the way my life and circumstances were. I do coach high school basketball. This is season 15 right now. We have won eight games and only lost two games, so we’re playing pretty well. Or seven-two sorry scratch that seven-two. And Buckeye Recovery Network is a place that I spend the majority of my time. It’s an Intensive Outpatient Treatment Center out here in Huntington Beach, you know, really passionate about the work we do and the people that work with there.


Got my Mom and Dad here – gotta say Hi to Mom and Dad. Thank you for the lunch yesterday and the takeaways home, very good. And Jess, how are you doing my friend? Hope you’re doing well. Always a pleasure to see you. By the way these ROM people I’m saying hi to, if you’re here for the first time it’s literally from all over the country, so the cool part is that it might not be a community of many but it’s a widespread community and that’s a pretty beautiful thing that we do here. 


So today we are gonna talk about something called the Pillars of Success. It’s a talk I’ve done a few other times. See, there’s a good example, Eileen from Miami Beach. Man, she’s been on for three – pretty much when we hit four – years right around our anniversary, I could say that Eileen and her family have been tuning in for that long and it’s a cool thing man, it’s a beautiful thing. So it’s all these people I’ve never really met in person but I kind of feel like I know them and they’ve been generous enough with their time to watch all of us go through so many different good and bad moments of life but we’ve stuck it together. 


So today I’m talking about the Pillars of Success. The last time I did it was like last February so for some of you who’ve been here you may have heard some of the content before. If you’re new it’s a really good talk and pretty much the premise of it is this: it comes from a book that the personal development guru – his name is Jim Rohn – he wrote with the help of an actual writer but it comes from a book. It’s a really nice story, it’s really easy to read. I could recommend it to even adolescents and obviously with adults. The audiobook version is really rich, the voice is very easy to listen to, but long story short, there are these pillars of success and I want you to know this. That success in life can be traced back to simple steps. Now the example I always use is like when you watch a CSI show that there’s a murder that happens in the beginning of the show and then at the end of the show they pretty much solve it. Well, if you think about it, how do they do it, well there are some markers. There’s things like fingerprints, there’s things like DNA, there’s things like motives and suspects, and there’s things like places and situations and footage, and by putting all that stuff together and reverse engineering back they can kind of get to where it all happened. Well it happens with crimes but I’m telling you this success is the same way. When something or someone is successful you can retrace the steps back and find out what are the shared elements, what are the fingerprints that those successful people leave behind, and those can all be found in the pillars of success. And with some of our staff actually at Buckeye I used to do the pillars of success as a personal development talk because I believe that all human beings would benefit from gaining these. So that’s what we’re going to talk about today. 


You can see on the bottom it says feel free to ask any questions anytime during the live stream or even after it. I do my best to respond in either real time or afterwards depending on the time but you can also talk about anything else you want. So if you’re watching this but you got something going on in your life right now feel free to ask a question. The community here is really gracious with their receptiveness and their openness to hear that. So long story short, there ain’t no bad questions when it comes to this space and so let’s get into it.


1. Now the first one is something I do a whole talk on its own but the first pillar of success is this thing called Personal Development. I’m not going to get too much into it because we recently did a talk on what personal development means and go watch it – it’s like three to five episodes before but I want you to hear this about personal development. Is this the only way your life will get better, is if you get better? See, it doesn’t say that if your circumstances get better, if your situations get better, if the people around you get better, if the world around you gets better, that’s when you’re going to get better. That’s false, that’s an illusion, that’s actually a delusion of thought – there is no truth or realness to that. The only time you are going to get better in life is when you get better. No one’s life has ever gotten better just by chance or just by luck. You might have little moments when you’re like, “Oh I’m on the right path,” and then it slaps you in the face again. So if you want your life to get better my friends stop sitting back and waiting for the world to change, and for the world to to all of a sudden transform, and start taking the steps to invest in yourself. Develop your skills, develop who you are, develop how you live and allow that person to create a better world, a better life, a better experience for himself or herself. That’s the essence of personal development. I do this talk oftentimes with some sales guys I work with and they’re high level competitive sales, big dollars, all that kind of stuff, and what I tell them is this. I say, “You are the most important account that you actually maintain. It’s not the big accounts that you work with, and you do all the sales with, you are the most important account. You must invest in yourself the same time, energy, effort that you invest in those big accounts. If you do so, those big accounts will grow but if you put all your time, energy, effort in those accounts and you don’t invest in yourself you will burn out and all of those accounts will burn out as well. Because there’s somebody else that’s investing in themselves right now, that’s investing in their personal development right now, that will not only meet you where you’re at, they’re going to overtake you and exceed you.” And that’s how all of a sudden they lose some accounts so in the recovery world just know that you are the most important person in your life. And if you’re waiting for your loved one to get better so you can get better, I’m telling you, it doesn’t work like that. I’ve seen many family members have their loved ones heal and get better but they’re still left feeling just destroyed and damaged and hurt, and can’t even know which way is up. If anything, when the loved one gets better they lose their identity because their whole life has been about fixing the situation and fixing their loved ones and helping their loved ones. And when they no longer need or want their help or fixing, they’re like, “I don’t know what to do. I’m not needed anymore in life.” 


So a couple more people popped up. We got Ryan Khosravi from Cabo San Lucas, how about that? His beautiful wife Alet, if you’re there too, Hi! And Mahboubeh Jan from Orange County, good to see you. Hey the family group starts back on the 19th of December in person. 


2. The next one we have here is Total Well-being, one of the pillars of development. So what does total well-being mean? It says that our total well-being is three-dimensional. Dimension one is your body. Dimension two is your mind, and dimension three is your spirit. Every day upon awakening or throughout the day you must do one thing at the minimum for each of those dimensions. Do you do something for your body? And I’m not talking about something excessive and extreme. I’m not saying you got to go sign up for a bootcamp class or a high-intensity interval training class and you don’t have to go get a $200 gym membership at the place that smells like essential oils. No, you don’t. Do you walk around the block, go up and down some stairs, do you move your body once a day? The answer is yes or no. The second one is, do you do something for your mind every day? Do you watch something, do you read something, do you hear something that elevates your mind, that elevates your thinking, that takes you to a higher vibration? Or do you not? And do you do something for your spirit every day, do you help out another human being, do you see someone struggling and walk up to them to see how you can make their day a little bit better? Do you close your eyes and pray sometimes or meditate on the things in your life that you have and sometimes even meditate on the things you don’t have? If the answer is yes to the mind, the body and the spirit every single day, you are on the path of success. If the answer is no, you’re on the path of disaster. The choice is yours my friends. But I can’t have a talk without addressing and touching that specific thing.


3. Now the next one we have is the Gift of Relationships. See, for some people in the mental health world, the addiction world, the trauma world, relationships not only were not a gift, they were a curse. There are so many of our program participants and so many people that have sat in chairs across from me that have shared with me horrific stories of relationships and upbringing and family dynamics and my heart goes out to them. Their birth family, their birth environment was not advantageous or favorable, however when we start the healing, recovery and transformation process the beauty is that we begin to create our friendships of choice, our families of choice. It would be beautiful if our birth relationships and our choice relationships could be the same. That’s awesome, that’s as good as it gets, but if you come from a highly dysfunctional, highly chaotic, highly toxic upbringing and as an adult you’re like, “I just can’t have these people around me anymore,” I want to give you permission to create your own family of choice. There’s nothing wrong with that. If you have to significantly decrease the amount of time and exposure you have to certain people feel free to, because if by not doing so they’re going to drain your vitality, they’re going to trigger you potentially lead you to some type of a behavioral or mental health or substance relapse, then why not just kind of keep at arm’s distance from them while you invest on yourself? And then make a decision once you feel like you’ve healed. But gifts of relationships are important and remember this. Relationships are like gardens. You must tend to them the same way gardens and nature and plants need certain things to be able to thrive, certain things to be able to reach their purest form, manifest to their purest version of themselves, like water and soil and air and nutrients and sunlight. Well, so do relationships – they need patience, they need love, they need communication, they need empathy, they need compassion, and it’s not like they need it once. They need it continuously throughout the year, and if you invest, if you tend to the garden of your relationships you can create some beautiful relationships. Because we all need them. We all know that none of us get from where we are in life to where we want to go without the help of other human beings. Those relationships are the reasons why we go from where we are to where we want to be. They are the catalysts of our transformation. So don’t sleep on the gift of relationships in your life. 


And Jim, by the way, for those of you guys who don’t know, obviously the majority of you do, but there’s always a few people that are watching this live or later – Jim is, I would say a master counselor, a highly trained clinical counselor really, when it comes to the space of family dynamics, addictions, recovery. And he always gives little good nuggets here so feel free to read his stuff. But he said “It’s such a gift to engage in positive relationships.” Unfortunately a lot of people that myself and Jim work with (and Jim’s by the way been working with me side by side for seven years which is a long time, going on eight I think, in February, that’s crazy) because a lot of people in their sickness or their addiction or their mental illness they engage in toxic relationships. So that’s why he is saying it’s a gift to engage in healthy relationships. And yeah, I was right about that, so yeah man, February, I don’t know, 16th or 20-something is our eight years of working side by side. Man that’s almost a decade, wow, that’s pretty cool.


4. So the next one I have here my friends is one of the pillars of success, Achieving Goals. Oh he’s got the actual date for what me and Jim were pretty much having a conversation right now – but it’s February 22nd – I was pretty right, I said 16 or 20 – I was somewhere in there. Yeah it is a beautiful relationship. Oh Michelle, what’s up? Hey yeah, Jim by the way, I hope you’re doing well, still I have a really good feeling you are, that’s why you’re here. The community, let’s just call it, really misses you. And good morning Jan. So what we have here is the next one, Achieving Goals. And ready for the statistic? Over 90 to 95% of people don’t have their goals written down. A lot of people have their goals right here in their mind but I believe a goal that is not written down is just a wish. And who makes wishes? Little kids on their birthday cake. That’s who makes wishes. Adults, people who want to taste and achieve and accomplish and conquer their goals and succeed, we don’t wish – we write those goals down like we talked about last week in our Think and Grow Rich discussion. We create tangible, actionable, time-oriented plans to achieve those things. And we address them day after day after day after day till they’re accomplished. So don’t be so wishy-washy my friends, make your life happen, and start by writing down your goals. And just carry them in your pocket, or in your notepad of your phone, however you want it. And then just make sure that you just go watch last week’s talk where I break this whole thing down in with barely a voice but I did it for you guys.


I’m happy to hear that she said she’s doing great, good stuff, representing us back there in your hometown!


5. So the next one we have here is the Proper Use of Time. I think I’m gonna spend a little time on this one because I really like it. So ready? This is one of my favorite quotes when it comes to time management and the quote is as follows: “Most people major in minor things.” What’s a minor thing? Things that a week from now, a month from now, a year from now, will have little to no impact on your life. People that a week from now, a month from now, a year from now, will have little impact on your life. Situations and circumstances that a week from now, a month from now, or a year from now, will have little to no impact on your life. Those are all minor things. What are the major things that from your past have had significant impact on your life, events that have had significant impact on your life, people that have had significant impact on your life? The major things in life to spend your time on is to address all of what you’ve experienced to heal from it, to recover from it, to transform from it. And why should we do so? So your future doesn’t look like your past. The only way your future is going to change is if you change the way you experienced all that you experienced and change your perspective and heal and grow from it. Because what do most people do? They major in minor things. You want to know why? Because when you focus on the person, the situation or the circumstance in your life right now that’s minor you don’t have to do one thing – guess what that one thing is? Focus on yourself. Focus on the major things. And what people do is they hyperfocus on these minor things, hyperfocus on stupid drama, hyperfocus on the most minute minuscule stuff that has no relevance or pertinence to their life in the future. And when the future comes, what happens? They say, “Why does my life never change?” It’s because you just major in minor things and the important part is to know that when we focus on the major things it’s hard. So as a clinician, I understand why people don’t want to do that because it’s hard, it’s overwhelming, it’s difficult, and they just take the path of least resistance. They take the easy way out and they focus on the minor things in life, thinking that they’re making progress, hoping that they’re making progress, wishing that they’re making progress. But like I said earlier, who wishes? Little kids, on birthday cake and candles, that’s who wishes. I’m not in the wishing group. I wouldn’t be doing this if I just wish you all well. I want you to do well, I want you to act well, I want you to major in the major things of your life, not the minor things of your life. And hey there’s some who say the powers to be might want us hyper focused on the minor things so we have no power when it comes to the major things. But whatever they do to us, however they condition us in society, don’t do that to yourself. Focus on the most important things in your life and everything else just look at it as a distraction, commercials and noise. Focus on the main event, focus on the main event. 


Jim says, “Study your past so your future is different.” I’m gonna add one thing to that Jim, which I agree with you there, but it’s not just study your past, see we can study something but when you learn the lessons, then you must apply the lessons. And if you apply the lessons your future will look different than your past because there’s a lot of people that can study their past, they can go over their past over and over and over over again, but they don’t learn the lesson. And they keep repeating it over and over and over again because they never learned the lesson. So studying is one thing, learning in internalizing and turning it into tangible actionable items is a whole other thing. And that’s what he’s talking about. When he says study he means study and act, not just study and study. Just want to clarify that.


6. The next one we have here is to learn how to Surround Yourself with the Best People. You might be saying to yourself, “Well how the heck do I know who and what the best people are?” Well, I’m going to give you some questions to ask about the people you spend your time with. So you want to sit back, relax and think about the people in your life. Who are they? How long have you known them and in what context? What is the type of relationship you have? And then you want to ask the following questions. Who am I around you? Kind of see how you spend the majority of your time, what effect are they having on me? So are they a plus in my life, or are they a minus in my life? Do they add to my life, or do they subtract from my life? What do they have me reading? What do they have me watching? What do they have me listening to? And if you’re wondering, “well why do the people in my life have to do those things?” it’s because people in life that are going somewhere in life, they’re usually reading something, watching something, or listening to something that takes them to a higher vibration. So you want the people in your life to also see you, what type of suggestions they’re making to you. The next one says, where do they have me going? Do they have you going to places that are going to positively impact your life? Or do they have you going to places that are like minor in the big scheme of life? Do they have you go to places that you’re not going to grow in? And the most important question I think to ask is, what do they have me thinking? And ultimately, what do they have me becoming? So when it comes to surrounding yourself with the best people this is what you got to do. You take a snapshot of the people in your life today – just take a picture, write their names down and then ask the following questions that I just said. And the most important ones are these people in my life – where do they have me going, what do they have me thinking, what impact /effect are they having on me? And what am I becoming as a result of being around these people? If you don’t like the answers to those, what are you supposed to do – I suggest you find other people and you might be saying, “Well, some of these are my family members, some of these people are my friends, I can’t just leave them.” Well, then you’re responsible for reducing and minimizing the amount of exposure you have to these people to a point that the effect they have on you isn’t so negative, the direction they have you going isn’t so negative, the low vibration, low kind of quality of thoughts, and conversations you have isn’t so severe. And go find something better, and if you can’t find something better go on YouTube, search things that’ll elevate your mind and elevate your thinking and elevate you as a person. And just entrench yourself with that stuff. I recently got a book so I’ve shared about my obsession with my road to becoming a pickleball player – singles pickleball player – I share about it all the time because the more you talk about it the more it becomes real. In one of the podcasts I listened to they recommended a book called Rafa which is an autobiography of a very famous tennis player that’s still playing. And Rafa is a Spaniard, so he’s from Spain, and I got this book and it’s an audio book. It’s like eight – nine hours long and I turned it on in the car as I drive because one thing I like to do is I love to make my car my classroom. If you ever sit in my car I’m always listening to some type of podcast. There’s never music on. I’m always listening to something and I put the podcast on and I’m listening to it and the whole thing is narrated, it’s in English, but with a really heavy Spanish accent so from Spain, so I’m like, all right man this is kind of cool. I get to listen to Rafa Nadal talk from his voice for his kind of autobiography but then I realized it’s not even him – it’s just some random dude – so the moral of the story is, it doesn’t matter how you get the information, you want to expose yourself to things that take you to a higher thought process, thinking vibration, even if it comes with a little cool accent. So I’m working through it, I’m doing my best to get through this book, but I’m gonna get through this book.


7. So the next one we have here is to Be a Lifelong Learner. I’ve been on record before saying please please please please please please pretty please do not become an expert at anything. Always know that there is room for improvement, room for growth, room for transformation. Even if you’re at the peak of whatever space you are in, just know that peak becomes the base of another peak. The greatest people in the world, and I’m not talking about greatness related to finances – I don’t think that way – I don’t care that way. The greatest people in the world, the people that are most fulfilled in the world, are on a constant quest of becoming their own best version of themselves, like there is no version of themselves they get to and say, “Ah, I’ve arrived,” When you achieve something and accomplish something and succeed at something, please pause for a bit, acknowledge your growth, take a view, soak in the view, take a couple deep breaths and say, “Man, this is beautiful, we made it, I made it, we did it,” but what you do after that – you get climbing again. Because there’s another you, there’s another milestone that’s going to be even sweeter. And the beauty of this is that ladder up has no limits, has no end, the only limit or end that it has is the limitation that you place upon yourself and place upon your life. I truly believe in that.


8. Now the next one we got here is the Power of Communication. This one’s important because a majority of people that come to this world, this world of someone who is firsthand or secondhand has been negatively impacted as a result of mental illness, addictions, trauma, grief and loss. When they come to this world they have difficulties and challenges with communicating and it’s not because they’re not good communicators – they might be at work, they might be excellent at what they do, but when it comes to communicating your thoughts and feelings it’s really emotionally charged. A lot of people freeze, a lot of people were never exposed to the proper role modeling, or education in their upbringing, to be able to have those psychological, emotional muscles develop. So they struggle with communication – it’s not a fault, it’s not a bad thing, but it’s something that if you identify with, that you struggle with communication, you got to start working on it. Because communication is one of those things my friends, that it just doesn’t get better on its own. I’ve never met somebody in life that was terrible at communicating and all of a sudden one day they just became very efficient at communication, they became a master communicator, they were able to identify their feelings, sit back and say I’m feeling sad, I’m feeling overwhelmed, I’m feeling stressed, I’m feeling angry and now I want to share with my loved one or share with my partner or share with my child. The experience I’m having as a result of those emotions, and I want to say it in a way that they can not only hear it but they can receive it and understand it, and they can provide some feedback back to me, and we can have a healthy two-sided dialogue. No one’s ever learned that on the fly. You want to know how you learn it? You work on your communication, you acknowledge your shortcomings, you acknowledge your flaws, you look at the history of where you learn communication, and identify it. I never learned it so I have a hard time doing it. You get yourself a support group, you get yourself a counselor, you get yourself a pen and paper, and your goal is to become a better communicator. And by the way, the better you become at communicating on a personal level the better you’re going to be communicating at a professional level. Communication is communication, but because you do it so often in one area and not so often in another area it’s really lopsided in people. So become a better communicator – it’ll do you freaking so much so much wonder in life.


9. The next one I got is to be a Great Leader. I believe all human beings are capable of being great leaders, and if you’re thinking to yourself, “Well, hey man, my kids are struggling or my spouse is struggling or I’m struggling, how can I be a good leader?” and maybe you’ve been doing this for a couple months now or a couple years now, just know that there’s another person, that is who and what you were when you first came into this world of recovery. You remember how scary it was for some of you? Remember how lost you felt? Remember how lonely you were and thought you’re the only person in the world going through this experience? Remember what it was like to send your kid to another state for recovery, your treatment or your loved one, or fly yourself to another state? Remember what it was like to feel your feelings for the first time, and to address all the guilt and shame and all the inadequacies of your life and all that kind of stuff? Remember that? Well, let’s look at this – there’s somebody else right now in this moment that’s going through that same experience – your experience becomes the most valuable asset and treasure to that person’s life because you get to share your experience, your strength and your hope about what the journey’s been like for you. See, when someone comes into that world it’s dark, they can’t see beyond their limits, beyond their fears, but you’ve been able to see what’s on the other side, you’ve been able to see a little further – they can’t see that. So your experience and your words is kind of like shining a light on what’s possible – it brings hope to the darkness, it takes what’s unseen and makes it seen a little bit. And sometimes that’s all they need.


Got a comment: “Lead through example because I learn from examples.” Yep, people rarely ever listen to what you say, they always watch what you do. If I could say that to parents I would say to parents all the time. “But I told my kid this and this…” I’m like, “Alright, well you told them but what did you show them?” Kids just watch, they’re very acute to their surroundings. They’re not listening to what you’re saying, they’re watching you. Have you ever noticed when you watch a foreign film that you don’t understand the words and there’s no subtitles, you can tell when someone’s angry or when someone’s calm or someone’s sad or someone’s happy, just by the tone and the way they’re speaking and just watching them? That language doesn’t mean anything to get the feel of something, like the words don’t mean anything. It’s how you present and how you lead by example that does it, so always lead by example.


10. And the last one we got here I think is what I try to do on all these talks and one day, one day, I guess when it’s all said and done, I don’t know if YouTube’s gonna exist 30-40 years from now, 50 years from now, however long I got on this planet, but it’d be kind of cool to go back and be like, “Oh my God, this guy’s got 50 years of footage trying to tell people that they can transform their lives, trying to tell people that they can be what it is that they always thought they could be, who it is they always thought they could be, they could go where they always wanted to go, if they only believed in the possibility of human transformation. It’d be kind of cool to have that legacy and I hope all of you are Building a Legacy of your own because at the end of the day this is it. We get a 100 years on this planet if we’re really lucky, we get 80 years on this planet if we’re lucky and sometimes we get a few years, sometimes we get 20, sometimes we get 40, some people get 43 like my brother, some people get 103, I don’t know but whatever it is that we get, all we get to do is leave behind who and what we were. So each one of you watching this has a legacy. Now some of you like the legacy you’ve created, some of you are not okay with the legacy you’ve created, some of you are half and half. Well, why not, while you still have the opportunity to create the legacy you want, why not build it and not leave it up to chance? Why not create the exact legacy you want? Is it too hard? Well, leaving this world without leaving the legacy you want is going to be pretty hard on other people, so make sure that you’re leaving a legacy. The quote there says, “You can’t choose how long you live but you can choose how well you live.” Live a good life, live a good life. If enough people subscribe to that way of thinking what happens? 


This world, this planet that we have occupied and live on that’s just floating in this thing called the galaxy with another 50 million planets in our own galaxy by the way, I don’t know if that growing up we thought there’s like nine planets or whatever the heck it was, there’s like 50 million planets in our own galaxy – they’re just so far apart that we never learn about them. And we think we’re all that and we’re flying through this thing called space that is limitless and just keeps going and we spin around ourselves as fast as possible and we move through this space as fast as possible and we think we have it all figured out. No we don’t, no we don’t. When our time’s done our legacy is all we have. You choose what you want to leave behind and if you want to leave a good one then my friends, make sure that you invest in yourself, your personal development, total well-being, mind body spirit every day. Nurture and tend to the relationships in your life. Write down your goals and achieve them. Make sure you use the proper use of time. Do not major in the minor things. Surround yourself with the best people and always ask yourself who do these people have me becoming? Be a lifelong learner, don’t be close-minded, don’t become an expert. Learn how to communicate efficiently and effectively. Learn how to take your emotions, translate them into words, deliver them in a way that the other person can receive them, internalize them and respond back to them in a way that’s effective. Be a great leader, just lead with what you got, where you are, however you can. And ultimately leave a beautiful, beautiful legacy that will last and pass the test of time.


So all that being said, next week I think I’m pretty sure I’ll be back here again next week. I have to check my schedule but I’ll leave a message if I’m not. Hopefully it was a valuable lesson. I appreciate and love all of you and yes Katalin, it is never too late. I learned what she wrote. I learned because people always say it’s never too late, but we got to learn that. Michelle said, “Thanks Parham and Buckeye for your encouragement, strength and hope.” Go do things over there in the beautiful state of Montana. And Jim, thank you as always, my man. Love and appreciate all of you. Have a wonderful weekend and I’ll see you back, same place, same time next week. Take care everyone!

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Kelsey Gearhart

Director of Business Development

Kelsey carries multiple years of experience working in the substance abuse and mental health treatment field. Her passion for this field comes from her personally knowing recovery from addiction.

Prior to Buckeye she held titles of Recovery Coach, Operations Director, and Admissions Director. Kelsey was brought on at Buckeye Recovery as the Director of Business Development. She has a passion for ensuring every individual gets the help that they need, and does so by developing relationships with other providers.

Kelsey also oversees our women’s sober living environments – The Chadwick House for Women. She is committed to creating a safe, nurturing, and conducive environment for all women that walk through the doors of Chadwick.