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The 4 Keys to Accomplishing Anything in Life and Recovery

Falling down is sometimes inevitable, but changing your perspective to recognize that failures are actually stepping stones to success and accomplishment can be the most important difference in creating breakthroughs from breakdowns. These 4 keys to accomplishing anything in life and recovery are taken from the 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, by John C Maxwell.

The Law of Victory

We need to talk a little bit about victory and here’s what it means in this context. You got to find a way to win. You have to find a way to win and you might say, “well, hey I don’t care about winning and losing that much.” Self-imposed limitations will only allow you to have a life that is just bland and you might say, “I’m not competitive.” That’s okay, look at yourself in the mirror and say, “I don’t care if this person wins or loses in life. I’m not that competitive.” Really, if you don’t care that you don’t win or lose in your own life, do you actually think anybody else will? Oh yeah, because everybody in life is just rooting for you to win? All they’re thinking about is your ability to succeed? Man, no, they’re not. Nobody cares if you don’t care about winning and losing in life. Nobody else is going to care if you don’t care about that reflection in the mirror winning in their life. They won’t.

How to identify a Win? The Beauty is that there is no definition

And now it becomes important to identify what winning is. The beauty of it is there is no definition. It’s what it is for you. What winning for me might not be winning for you, and what winning for you might not be winning for me, but you have to identify it and then do everything in your power to accomplish that stated goal. Winning is subjective, I get it, no judgment at all. Winning for some people might be just to have the most amazing beautiful connected experience with their family and their community and that’s it, they’re okay. That’s wonderful, but make sure you win. Winning for some people might be a certain status or job or academic goal or living in a certain place, or doing a certain thing. Whatever it is I don’t care, just go win and when you win make sure that you stop to acknowledge the fact that you just won. Because winning, achieving small milestones and victories, gains a little bit of momentum. And like I said, it’s subjective. So also the most important part, in my opinion at least, when we’re talking about winning and losing is to find victories in defeats. I mean, if you could do that then you’re onto something. Because I like this really awesome definition of success, and it said how one person can go from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm in between. Wow, I mean, that’s it – how can I go from one failure to another failure, without ever losing any enthusiasm in between? Because that’s where it happens. Because after every failure are the most amount of opportunities to win in your life. After every breakdown there’s an opportunity and a possibility for a breakthrough. Embrace it. But some people see setbacks, perceive defeat as like, “oh I knew I couldn’t do it. There’s no point of even trying.” Self-imposed limitations. Those people that do the things they want to do they’re just okay with failing, but because they’ve hacked into something they realize that in order to gain victory you must go through defeat. You must. It’s the only way sometimes people learn, that sometimes people don’t. That’s okay.

The Law of Empowerment

The main ingredient in empowerment is the belief in people. So when you look at yourself in the mirror you must believe in that reflection, man. Because like I said earlier, if you don’t believe in him or her, who else is? Maybe your mom, maybe your dad, maybe your family, but the only reason they believe in it by the way, is because you happen to share the same last name as them. And because they’ve seen your potential, they believe in your potential. But outside of that who else is going to believe in you, if you don’t believe in yourself? I believe in you, but this is kind of my passion. I believe in the possibility of human transformation. It’s not even about you. I just believe that all human beings can transform, even the ones that society says, “not him, not her.” I’ve seen enough hims and hers transform to not believe that stupid thing society says. So you must believe in yourself and how do you help people reach their potential? 

How to Help a Loved One Reach Their Potential?

This is important for family members, if you’re watching this, wondering how the heck am I going to help my kid reach their potential? Three things. 

Number one, if you can give them access to resources. I’m not saying money, resources for help, resources for change, resources for transformation. 

Number two, give them responsibility – the more you take responsibility for the lives of others the more they will not be able to take responsibility for their own lives. We people, when we choose to carry them, the most strong healthy able-bodied human beings, when carried all the time, will eventually become crippled and unable to function and use their limbs to do the things they have to do, unable to use their mind to think, unable to use their body to move, unable to use their life to live. So give them respect, responsibility, and lastly give them autonomy. 

Number three, Autonomy, the freedom to make a choice – that’s what it means. And sometimes people say, “well, I don’t know but I just don’t trust their decision-making.” Eventually, people have to be autonomous in their decisions and as a family member, you got to let him do it but here’s the catch. And this is what family members don’t know how to do, or afraid to do. 

 

Remember this, that people are free to make any choice they want in life but they’re not free of the consequences of those choices. So if your loved one makes some choices that have natural consequences, negative consequences, let them go through it. Because if they don’t learn that lesson that every action has a reaction then they will never understand the reaction their actions are having. And it’s not a cold thing to do to somebody, it’s not a callous thing to do to somebody, it’s the right thing to do for people to allow them to understand that in this thing we call life, if I choose to do something, I am also choosing the consequences that come with it. By the way, not all reactions in life or consequences in life are negative. If I go to the gym and eat well all the time the consequence of that is going to be good markers in my blood levels, in a good physical healthy body. If I choose to drink alcohol and do drugs all the time the consequences of that could be legal, financial, physical. We’re okay when the person gets the positive consequences but of the negative ones I got to save them from it. Well, you can continue to be a hero in the life of someone else and realize that that person’s life is completely shattering. I wouldn’t say this if your kid was young but once they become adults just be mindful of how you potentially might be crippling those that you carry.

The Law of Priorities

Remember this, that if you want to take the person that you see in the mirror, if you want to lead the person you see in the mirror and you do so without having priorities in life, of knowing what is the most important things that you have to accomplish that day, that week, that month, that year, and you just go with the flow and kind of just ebb and flow with the way that the waves and the wind and the air moves, just know you are floating to Destination Nowhere. I’m not saying you have to live in a rigid box and have so much structure that you have no freedom or spontaneity. I’m not saying that. But you must prioritize what is important, or what is important will be lost in the midst of life. Most successful people I know prioritize the living heck out of their life, the things that are most important to them. You will know what it is. You look at the way they live their life, you look at how they carry themselves, you look at how they speak, you know what’s important to them. And if you ever leave a conversation not knowing what’s important to somebody there is a really really good feeling that they don’t prioritize anything. So are you productive, or are you busy? Completely different things. Productivity does not equal busyness. I could show you people that do one thing or two things a day, completely to the end, very productive, and I can show you people to do 50 things in a day, the human doings, and at the end of the day they sit down and didn’t accomplish anything. Are you productive or are you busy?

The Law of Timing

This is important. Time and place are two of the most important factors to accomplishing anything. If I told you guys, “hey, after this talk I’ll see you at Starbucks,” and we get off and you say, “oh my God, I didn’t ask them what Starbucks, and what time.” Okay, so time and place is important. But if I say, “I’ll see you at the Starbucks over there on Pacific Coast Highway,” and I leave you go to the Starbucks Pacific Coast Highway, you don’t know what time I’m coming. Time is important. Or if I say “I’ll see you at Starbucks at 1:30,” but I don’t tell you which one you got one out of couple hundred thousand of them to pick from but you might find it eventually. 

Timing is important, my friends. In the time when you look at yourself in the mirror, the place in which you look at yourself in the mirror, I believe the timing is right for you to begin leading that reflection to a life that you want to live. The timing is right, the time is now. It is the right time, it is the right place. You are the right person. Look at yourself in the mirror and make a decision in your heart first. Because you can’t call for action until you touch a heart. Make a decision in your heart first, then take it to your mind and visualize it, because everything in life is made twice – once inside the mind and once inside reality. Make a commitment to lead that reflection to where he or she not only deserves to go but needs to go for themselves and the lives of others. If you do that I will feel eternally repaid, and if you don’t there’s absolutely nothing I could do about it. Because I have learned one thing, that no matter what I do or what I say or how I say it people do what they want to do, when they want to do it, and all I could do is stay committed and consistent and continue to deliver the messages of hope, love and recovery that I do.

Call Buckeye Recovery Today!

Are you in recovery but not making progress? Recovery is not only possible but attainable, and it all begins with reaching out for assistance. By addressing both addiction and mental health issues, individuals can break free from the cycle of despair and embark on a path to a healthier, more fulfilling life. Contact Buckeye Recovery Network today and initiate your journey to recovery and improved mental health. Our dedicated team of professionals is here to guide and support you every step of the way.

Today is going to be the best day of your life.

Kelsey Gearhart

Director of Business Development

Kelsey carries multiple years of experience working in the substance abuse and mental health treatment field. Her passion for this field comes from her personally knowing recovery from addiction.

Prior to Buckeye she held titles of Recovery Coach, Operations Director, and Admissions Director. Kelsey was brought on at Buckeye Recovery as the Director of Business Development. She has a passion for ensuring every individual gets the help that they need, and does so by developing relationships with other providers.

Kelsey also oversees our women’s sober living environments – The Chadwick House for Women. She is committed to creating a safe, nurturing, and conducive environment for all women that walk through the doors of Chadwick.