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Your Inability to Ask or Receive Support is an Issue

How many mothers and parents try their best to control the outcome of the lives of their children and they realize the more they try to control it the more it becomes out of control. The more they try to control it the more they lose control themselves. And before you know it the loved one’s sick, the mom’s sick, everyone’s sick, and it’s just a very very dysfunctional family system. Please remember this – that you did what you did at the time and it was the best you knew. Especially if you were never raised well how are you supposed to give something you don’t have? But now my friends that are better, you are responsible to do better now that you know better, you’re just responsible to do better.

Are you Living the Unlived Lives of your Mother?

Living the unlived lives of your mother and not being true to your own dreams is a sign that you have had mothering issues. Children that come from family dysfunction, a dysfunctional maternal role in their life, they start to feel guilt. And when they get older they have this perception that they have to be someone that they’re mother or maternal role would say what I’m proud of, I love and care for. And often times they don’t know that by being authentically themselves they can achieve that same outcome. So what they do is give up on their own goals and dreams and do what it is that they think that maternal role wants them to do, or be who that maternal role wants them to be, in order to receive the love they never got. I’ve had many human beings say, “The life I’m living is not the life I wanted. It’s the life I thought my parents wanted me to live.” That is so sad to give up your own authenticity to give up your own genuine kind of individuality who you are because you want the world around you to say, “Oh thank you.” How many kids go to colleges and take majors that they don’t want to take because they think that by doing so they’re living the unlived lives of their parents. So sad because in that scenario they’re never going to experience passion, happiness, joy. If anything they’re going to be resentful, pissed off, bitter people, get into relationships with people that they think that their mom wants them to get into. Who’s living your life? And that comes from the deficiency and the deficits created in childhood. So if you are living the unlived lives of those who raised you and you’re giving up your own kind of dreams, hopes, passions in life, it is a telltale sign that you need to be remothered.

Human Beings Need Support

The inability to ask and receive support is huge in life because as human beings going through life for the very first time we need to ask for help. You need to get support or else you’re not going to know what the hell you’re doing life. It’s very similar to a very complicated box that comes from Ikea and it’s got 5,000 different things that you got to do to set up one stupid item. If that box did not come with an instruction manual you will have a really hard time. Well guess what, life does not come with an instruction manual and it’s the most complex box you could ever get that you need to assemble. In order to do so you must ask for help and support. And growing up, if you were not able to ask for help from your maternal role because maybe that person was going through a lot themselves and you thought by adding a little bit of your stuff to it it’s going to overwhelm the family system, and potentially it’s going to cause harm to them, and potentially it’s gonna be a burden on them, guess what you did? You closed your mouth, you didn’t ask for help, you didn’t need support. You tried to do it on your own. Well if that was the case how is it working for you? How is life? How is living in this complicated world without asking for help and support working for you? I know it’s not really working. I’m a clinician. I sit with people. They tell me about their inability to ask for help and they’re never living lives. They’re thriving and for those people to say, “Well, I just didn’t do it because I don’t want to be a burden, I don’t want to…” where did you learn that lesson? You think if you’re an adult right now saying I don’t want to be a burden on somebody else, where do you think you learned that lesson? Please please don’t think you just learned that right now, or you’re being mindful or you’re being kind of respectful. You learn that because at some point you felt like you were a burden. So if you have the inability to ask for help seek support. It is a very very telltale sign that you need to be remothered in life.

Call Buckeye Recovery Today!

Are you in recovery but not making progress? Recovery is not only possible but attainable, and it all begins with reaching out for assistance. By addressing both addiction and mental health issues, individuals can break free from the cycle of despair and embark on a path to a healthier, more fulfilling life. Contact Buckeye Recovery Network today and initiate your journey to recovery and improved mental health. Our dedicated team of professionals is here to guide and support you every step of the way.

Today is going to be the best day of your life.

Kelsey Gearhart

Director of Business Development

Kelsey carries multiple years of experience working in the substance abuse and mental health treatment field. Her passion for this field comes from her personally knowing recovery from addiction.

Prior to Buckeye she held titles of Recovery Coach, Operations Director, and Admissions Director. Kelsey was brought on at Buckeye Recovery as the Director of Business Development. She has a passion for ensuring every individual gets the help that they need, and does so by developing relationships with other providers.

Kelsey also oversees our women’s sober living environments – The Chadwick House for Women. She is committed to creating a safe, nurturing, and conducive environment for all women that walk through the doors of Chadwick.